Life here is rich-like chocolate cheesecake; like pumpkin beer. Do you know the music of Stuart Davis? I have been listening to several of his songs. The music often runs deep and explores questions that many don't even seem to consider. In one song, the artist sings "Love is so wide that there isn't a boundary." There is a book I have read titled House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski. The book, among other things, is about a house that is bigger on the inside than it is on the outside.
Living is like these two things: the reality that a human's being is larger on the inside than it is on the outside, and the hard fact that a tape measure cannot be dropped along the edges of any relationship.
I seem to have learned somewhere that LOVE is bounded, defined, and connoted by society: a thing to be controlled and to which access must be limited. Somewhen, I began to believe that LOVE is shameful, humiliating, embarrassing and wrong unless it fits into an acceptable boundary, definition, or connotation. I became a stunted, twisted, wizened husk of a human being, living a life empty of meaning.
My Beloved entered my life and I said: "I LOVE you." Just like that, what was in me was freed to be without. Just like that, I connected to the LOVE that is all around-the LOVE that is immanent and in which my definition of love participates.
Why do so many parents and friends get it wrong? Why do we insist that we must learn to contain ourselves within locked and shuttered houses? Why do we persist in the idea that LOVE can only be as large as someone else's wounds?
I wish you a day free from the fear of LOVE and outside the inside parameters of your home,
Cobalt Dreams
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