Dear Pneuma,

There is a folk song that says, "I love my Love, because I know my Love loves me." I think the song lies. I love my Love, because I first decided to love me. Allowing that I can be loveable, my capacity to love is not bound by another's response to me. In fact, love undid me, because I realized that I love my Love, whether or not my Love loves me.

Blues songs know this. They know that love is perilous. They know that the Beloved is an imperfect and often unkind person, but that this unloving nature doesn't change my love for the Beloved. Yet, still, I think Blues songs lie, because true love comes from an ability to care and be kind first to oneself. Loving myself, I cannot submit to relationship with a Beloved that does not love me.

I love my Love because my Love is wonderful. My Love loves me because I am wonderful. We are fortunate, because we decided to love one another. I think we love one another because we have walked away from other Loves before.

Who's writing songs about this kind of bittersweet reality?

"Lemon Meringue" by Poe
"Head Over Feet" by Alanis Morissette
"Don't Think of Me" by Dido

Keep Well,
Cobalt Dreams